“Grieve” – To mourn or sorrow for – A normal process of reacting to loss.

Ecclesiastes 3:1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens

:4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,

Dearest beloved, I would like to share one other story with you. I pray that Abba Father will touch you and guide you through your time of grieving and letting go. He has made provision for times like these in our lives. He has everything ready to take you through these times of letting go. All you need to do is to allow Him to help you through this process. May Holy Spirit rest on you as you read this and may He wrap Himself around you and take charge over you in Jesus name.

Letting go

Our season has come to leave our home that we have lived in for 16 years. We have raised and homeschooled our children here. Our blood, sweat and tears went into this place. Many memories were made and altars of worship and praise have been built for our King Jesus. Gladness, joy, sadness, breakthroughs, healings, deliverance, peace and the list goes on and on – This was our home! Then God said: “Buy a land!” A land flowing with milk and honey, a land of peace and rest! A land far, far, far away from everyone and everything we know. Exciting but more scary.

When the time came to start packing up I could feel how I started numbing my emotions from how I really felt about leaving all behind. It was supposed to be a happy, exciting time, but I didn’t feel it. I also started feeling sick in my stomach from keeping everything cropped up by not expressing what I felt. I felt that I would hurt my family that was excited for the move with my negativity (which was a lie, it was not negativity, it was my mothers heart that had to let go of the memories of raising my children in this house).

One morning while I was busy with my quiet time the Lord spoke to me and said:” I give you 3 days to grieve”. It was almost a shock to me because grieve is such a strong word, not to speak of the emotion. I said grieve Lord, I mean, is it really that bad that I have to grieve about it? I immediately felt that this was needed to disconnect myself from the old so that I could embrace the new season with open arms. I said to the Lord that I would grieve my 3 days, but I needed Him to take full charge so that it wouldn’t be a time of torment and that He needed to trigger me so that I could start letting it all out – for my feelings were bottled up so well. Oh man, He did it so well. I found photos of me homeschooling our children, I remembered certain instances of praying through the night with ill children, spending time with the Lord in the early morning hours, I remembered the worship sessions we held and so many more. Each one of these memories brought a lot of tears. I had to feel the sadness to affectively disconnect from the land and space.

I have learnt in this time that letting go in the grieving was not a shameful or bad thing, it is necessary for us to express and release that which we feel so that we can move into the new season, new relationships, building new memories etc. with hope and excitement. We can’t move on if we don’t disconnect completely from the old.

These 3 days were hard, but Holy Spirit was closely helping and comforting me. Everyday I could feel how that feeling of despair and the pain in my body left. On the third day Jesus came and started ministering and packing me with that which He was giving us to take into the new land. My heart was completely sorted out and I was ready to leave this home behind.

Summary

Beloved, when you face a time where you have to let go of a relationship, a home, a job, a loved one that passed or whatever it may be. It is important to disconnect properly by allowing yourself to feel and express your sadness and heartache. If you don’t disconnect and release yourself, you will struggle in your new space and new relationships. You will have difficulty to move on. Let us not waste time by staying in a numbed state and by bottling up our pain. Let us make sure to disconnect, release and allow God to show us what must take place. DON’T GET STUCK! Come on let’s walk on…

Let us pray: Abba Father, I know I have to let go, I know I have to move on, but I am scared. I am scared of the unknown, I am scared of loneliness. I am scared I won’t make it. I am scared of allowing the sadness to come out. I am scared of really feeling. I repent Father, fear is not from You. Please forgive me and wash me in Your blood in Jesus name. You know what is best for me and what space or place or relationships I need to grow some more. I surrender, Father. Father, I give You permission to supervise my letting go. Please keep me from torment in Jesus name. Please take hold of me and guide me through all the times in my life of disconnecting and moving into the new. I trust You to prepare my spirit for these seasons so that it will not be overwhelming for me to deal with in the future, in Jesus name. Into Your hands I commit my life and the preparation of my spirit to embrace every shift and change that will come my way. Come Lord Jesus come! You are welcome to take me through in Jesus name! Amen and amen.